I ONCE obtained a letter from an irate reader at my earlier newspaper accusing us of creating his life an utter distress.
Though barely tongue in cheek, he blamed our shiny weekend lifestyle options for fuelling his spouse’s calls for for a extra des res dwelling, leading to him spending all his free time both up a ladder portray or fixing rest room tiles in an effort to carry their home as much as scratch. This, he stated, was our fault, and wanted sorting instantly with much less interesting stuff in our pages.
After all, all of us had a very good chuckle at this and, being the sympathetic bunch we have been, made positive we crammed the subsequent version with as many trendy and tempting illustrations as we may.
It’s solely now I’m beginning to marvel if the letter was from an exasperated Boris Johnson writing incognito about an earlier refurbishment disaster.
Twenty years on, the need for the finer issues in life is stronger than ever, as we aspire to one thing larger, higher, brasher and brighter. Reveals resembling the wonderful Scotland’s House of the 12 months faucet into this want for somewhat “posh”, whereas satisfying the urge to nosey inside different people’s houses, all from the consolation of your individual worn-out coffee-stained couch.
However whether or not pushed by snobbery or creativity it does take plenty of dedication (and generally a useful dollop of ignorance as anybody who has watched Grand Designs will attest) to rework your humble abode into an imitation Babylonian villa or reproduction Studio 54 nightclub.
I’ve enormous respect for these with the talents and braveness to make their home desires a actuality. However I’ve at all times had a idea that these lucky sufficient to be armed with the know-how to suit a brand new kitchen or plaster the hallway may have had that information handed down from a father or mother, usually their father. The rule is, if somebody’s “useful” about the home, the chances are their outdated man was fairly helpful too.
However for these of us whose father – like my very own, god relaxation his soul – didn’t know the distinction between a spirit degree and the holy spirit, the world of even easy DIY has proved a lifelong battle. I won’t be in peril of complicated a hairdryer with a Bosch hand drill, however flicking by way of a Screwfix catalogue is akin to studying hieroglyphs.
Nonetheless, over lockdown as thousands and thousands of us have run out of excuses to not get that job executed, I’ve been fortunate to find the newest web sensation Rob Kenney, whose YouTube channel “Dad, how do I?” is filled with helpful suggestions for hapless blokes like me.
His motivation stems from his tough childhood after his father left dwelling, leaving him and his seven siblings with out somebody to show them fundamental survival expertise.
Because of Rob, I’m now a grasp (though my spouse could disagree) at making use of sealant spherical the bathtub, which is a helpful begin. However regardless of my new-found knowledge, I’m resisting the urge to get too carried away. In spite of everything, I wouldn’t need my handiwork that includes within the Herald Journal and ruining some put-upon husband’s life. The guilt can be simply an excessive amount of.
Our columns are a platform for writers to precise their opinions. They don’t essentially signify the views of The Herald.